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Who even was that person that said your twenties were supposed to be the best years of your life? Okay, don't get me wrong the next 600 words or so are not going to just be me rambling on about my first world problems and how terrible my life is. I have a fantastic job, a secure and (sometimes) stable family that love me, a group of friends that I can rely on for a good time and my health which, of course is the most important thing. I'm not really talking about the fundamentals in my life but the "What if's" and that little devil on my right shoulder putting all sorts of naughty, uncharacteristically spontaneous ideas in my head that makes me think for a bit - "Oh what a great idea!"


Your twenties are supposed to be the time you're finally finding your feet as a person, your school days are behind you and you can start that long exciting path to career success and a happy marriage. MMMM so simple! I think they forget to tell you about the impossible task of saving enough money to be able to move out (especially if like me, you're trying to do it on your own) which leaves you living at your parents embarrassingly until your late twenties, heck maybe even early thirties until you actually have enough to buy somewhere on your own - and even then it's a poxy shared ownership. "Oh but at least you're on the property ladder" oh just shutup, Claire.
They also leave out the small detail about your circle of friends getting that ever so much smaller...for one reason or another but it leaves you wondering who you can actually trust and rely on and somewhat more sensitive when one of your friends can't make it to a little get together you organised, so you begin to take it personally and, ironically start pushing away said friend. I even start to worry about not having enough friends, which is ridiculous when my whats'app pings off almost every 2 minutes from one group or an other. They also don't tell you how bloody hard it is to find any guy that is remotely respectful, charming, funny and kind and doesn't just want to have 5 minutes of fun following a bloody Tinder conversation! What the bloody hell happened to meeting people in a bar anyway! Speaking of bars, I wonder whether i'm partying too much or too little. Am I drinking too much alcohol? Heck am I even drinking my two litres of water everyday!? And even when you do find that special someone and I might have already, should I be thinking about marriage yet? Why is everyone else already getting married? If I get married too late will it be too late for me to have children? .... Jesus 

This constant cycle of questions and worrying is all too familiar in my life and I wonder how many other people have felt this way? Well, apparently, an article on Glamour stated that 82% of 24-35 year old's have admitted to having a 'crisis' in their best years...how bloody fantastic! With social media and comparisons so easily accessible at our finger tips, we're constantly swiping stories on Instagram, seeing pictures all over Facebook of ultrasounds, the newly engaged, perfectly manicured hands or that absolutely stupid cliche "I just bought my first house, so i'm going to hold the keys and a bottle of cheap Prosecco and awkwardly stand outside the front door" picture. (Not bitter at all). It's proven that the age of 25 has created this new found source of anxiety. Where some have built up businesses instead of going to uni or found fame on YouTube, it leaves others struggling to even get a paid internship once they've got their degree and the idea of even renting a small flat anytime soon is completely out of the question.


This all makes us question our achievements, makes us feel as though we haven't earned them as we haven't 'got lucky' by our tender age of 25. At school, I bet 90% of your class thought that at the age of 25 you'd be settled with the man/woman of your dreams, planning a wedding, a diary that is just bursting from invites from friends to all sorts of exciting plans and a career that can kick Sunday dread out the window? Yeah, me too...

Okay, now my life isn't shit. I've just bought a new car, a new cat and i'm saving to move out hopefully next year. But it's not just about that, millennial's now live in a time where keeping up appearances online to people you haven't seen in 8 years is the daily norm. We are constantly fed bullshit information that if we don't own that Topshop jacket we aren't going to be trendy, if we don't each brunch at the weekends and post a picture of the perfectly formed poached eggs with a side of avocado, then we are inadequate. Marketing has become so dangerous that we spending money more than ever to fulfill our lives because of the constant comparisons and influences we are fed online, it leaves us just wanting more and more. We are never fully satisfied.

I've been reading The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck by Mark Manson (great book by the way, I definitely recommend!) recently and he explains it quite well "Whatever makes us happy today will no longer make us happy tomorrow, because our biology always needs something more. A fixation on happiness inevitably amounts to a never-ending pursuit of 'something else' - a new house, a new relationship, another child, another pay-rise. And despite all of our sweat and strain, we end up feeling eerily similar to how we started: inadequate." 

I'm a prime example, like I say, I've just treated myself to a new car, I have a job that allows me to go out with journalists to the nicest brunch spots and i'm quickly saving up money to buy a flat. But none of that matters...I see proposals, houses, new makeup hauls, clothes hauls, whatever it may be online and I instantly feel not good enough. I need more. I compare and just concentrate on what I haven't got instead of what I have!


So, how do you deal with a mid-twife crisis? This goes full-circle with some of my other recent posts on here...you need to learn to switch off! I've had a massive clear out of friends on social media, because to be honest I don't need to know about half of them and that they recently invested in bitcoins or whatever bullsh*t it might be. I've also learned to literally switch off from social media, i'm a massive victim of FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out for those who aren't down with the abbreviations) and I find that saying no to a night out super hard even if I can't be bothered. So, if I choose to say no, I say to myself to not go on social media that evening, so I don't have to see what everyone is getting up to on the night out I turned down. I get lost into a book or film I've been wanting to watch and that way escape into a world that isn't my own! By the morning i'm hangover free and FOMO is myth.

Another thing I need to start doing more often, is calling my friends. Just picking up the phone and having a real conversation with them. The friend you secretly envy online don't post about all the sh*t days at work and anxiety troubles so by calling them it's good to chat about it and realise they might just be feeling exactly the same as you are!

I think everyone deep down goes through this quarter-life weird, confusing crisis as no one really writes or gives you a manual on how to live your life and not knowing where you'll be in a year or 5 year's to come can be a little daunting! Coming into the New Year I've vowed to myself to live each day as it comes and to not put too much pressure on myself to be like the other people I see online...easy said than done but we will see how long that will last! 

Would love to hear if any of you have felt similarly to this! 
Best wishes,
Hannah x

|| Coat Zara (Similar) ||
|| Leggings NIKE || 
|| Trainers Adidas ||



Am I having a Quarter-life Crisis?


Who even was that person that said your twenties were supposed to be the best years of your life? Okay, don't get me wrong the next 600 words or so are not going to just be me rambling on about my first world problems and how terrible my life is. I have a fantastic job, a secure and (sometimes) stable family that love me, a group of friends that I can rely on for a good time and my health which, of course is the most important thing. I'm not really talking about the fundamentals in my life but the "What if's" and that little devil on my right shoulder putting all sorts of naughty, uncharacteristically spontaneous ideas in my head that makes me think for a bit - "Oh what a great idea!"


Your twenties are supposed to be the time you're finally finding your feet as a person, your school days are behind you and you can start that long exciting path to career success and a happy marriage. MMMM so simple! I think they forget to tell you about the impossible task of saving enough money to be able to move out (especially if like me, you're trying to do it on your own) which leaves you living at your parents embarrassingly until your late twenties, heck maybe even early thirties until you actually have enough to buy somewhere on your own - and even then it's a poxy shared ownership. "Oh but at least you're on the property ladder" oh just shutup, Claire.
They also leave out the small detail about your circle of friends getting that ever so much smaller...for one reason or another but it leaves you wondering who you can actually trust and rely on and somewhat more sensitive when one of your friends can't make it to a little get together you organised, so you begin to take it personally and, ironically start pushing away said friend. I even start to worry about not having enough friends, which is ridiculous when my whats'app pings off almost every 2 minutes from one group or an other. They also don't tell you how bloody hard it is to find any guy that is remotely respectful, charming, funny and kind and doesn't just want to have 5 minutes of fun following a bloody Tinder conversation! What the bloody hell happened to meeting people in a bar anyway! Speaking of bars, I wonder whether i'm partying too much or too little. Am I drinking too much alcohol? Heck am I even drinking my two litres of water everyday!? And even when you do find that special someone and I might have already, should I be thinking about marriage yet? Why is everyone else already getting married? If I get married too late will it be too late for me to have children? .... Jesus 

This constant cycle of questions and worrying is all too familiar in my life and I wonder how many other people have felt this way? Well, apparently, an article on Glamour stated that 82% of 24-35 year old's have admitted to having a 'crisis' in their best years...how bloody fantastic! With social media and comparisons so easily accessible at our finger tips, we're constantly swiping stories on Instagram, seeing pictures all over Facebook of ultrasounds, the newly engaged, perfectly manicured hands or that absolutely stupid cliche "I just bought my first house, so i'm going to hold the keys and a bottle of cheap Prosecco and awkwardly stand outside the front door" picture. (Not bitter at all). It's proven that the age of 25 has created this new found source of anxiety. Where some have built up businesses instead of going to uni or found fame on YouTube, it leaves others struggling to even get a paid internship once they've got their degree and the idea of even renting a small flat anytime soon is completely out of the question.


This all makes us question our achievements, makes us feel as though we haven't earned them as we haven't 'got lucky' by our tender age of 25. At school, I bet 90% of your class thought that at the age of 25 you'd be settled with the man/woman of your dreams, planning a wedding, a diary that is just bursting from invites from friends to all sorts of exciting plans and a career that can kick Sunday dread out the window? Yeah, me too...

Okay, now my life isn't shit. I've just bought a new car, a new cat and i'm saving to move out hopefully next year. But it's not just about that, millennial's now live in a time where keeping up appearances online to people you haven't seen in 8 years is the daily norm. We are constantly fed bullshit information that if we don't own that Topshop jacket we aren't going to be trendy, if we don't each brunch at the weekends and post a picture of the perfectly formed poached eggs with a side of avocado, then we are inadequate. Marketing has become so dangerous that we spending money more than ever to fulfill our lives because of the constant comparisons and influences we are fed online, it leaves us just wanting more and more. We are never fully satisfied.

I've been reading The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck by Mark Manson (great book by the way, I definitely recommend!) recently and he explains it quite well "Whatever makes us happy today will no longer make us happy tomorrow, because our biology always needs something more. A fixation on happiness inevitably amounts to a never-ending pursuit of 'something else' - a new house, a new relationship, another child, another pay-rise. And despite all of our sweat and strain, we end up feeling eerily similar to how we started: inadequate." 

I'm a prime example, like I say, I've just treated myself to a new car, I have a job that allows me to go out with journalists to the nicest brunch spots and i'm quickly saving up money to buy a flat. But none of that matters...I see proposals, houses, new makeup hauls, clothes hauls, whatever it may be online and I instantly feel not good enough. I need more. I compare and just concentrate on what I haven't got instead of what I have!


So, how do you deal with a mid-twife crisis? This goes full-circle with some of my other recent posts on here...you need to learn to switch off! I've had a massive clear out of friends on social media, because to be honest I don't need to know about half of them and that they recently invested in bitcoins or whatever bullsh*t it might be. I've also learned to literally switch off from social media, i'm a massive victim of FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out for those who aren't down with the abbreviations) and I find that saying no to a night out super hard even if I can't be bothered. So, if I choose to say no, I say to myself to not go on social media that evening, so I don't have to see what everyone is getting up to on the night out I turned down. I get lost into a book or film I've been wanting to watch and that way escape into a world that isn't my own! By the morning i'm hangover free and FOMO is myth.

Another thing I need to start doing more often, is calling my friends. Just picking up the phone and having a real conversation with them. The friend you secretly envy online don't post about all the sh*t days at work and anxiety troubles so by calling them it's good to chat about it and realise they might just be feeling exactly the same as you are!

I think everyone deep down goes through this quarter-life weird, confusing crisis as no one really writes or gives you a manual on how to live your life and not knowing where you'll be in a year or 5 year's to come can be a little daunting! Coming into the New Year I've vowed to myself to live each day as it comes and to not put too much pressure on myself to be like the other people I see online...easy said than done but we will see how long that will last! 

Would love to hear if any of you have felt similarly to this! 
Best wishes,
Hannah x

|| Coat Zara (Similar) ||
|| Leggings NIKE || 
|| Trainers Adidas ||



Is it just me or is it bloody dark in the mornings now? I struggle as much as anyone to venture out of my cosy bed (even with a 4 month old kitten constantly attacking me trying to play from 5am, I ain’t movin’!) as much as anyone but jesus, I can’t lie, I am very excited for the clocks to go back even to get just that little bit more light for a month, until the impending darkness that is December and January comes to stay!

This weekend marks the official start of Winter. Does this mean it’s now socially acceptable to stay in at the weekend in a onesie, with a glass of red wine in hand? I think so! 
|| To read original blog post, head to Eylure! ||

As much as I love the Summer, I am very ready for cosy evenings, wrapped up warm, watching films, getting fat, eating multiple mince pies, Quality Street, Heroes, Ferrero Rocher’s…the list goes on…As the Summer officially ends I’m seeing it off in style with a house party at my friends house. It’s fancy dress of course and for my sins, I’m actually dressing up. Well, I say dressing up, does a black dress and red cape count? (I’m Little Red Riding Hood if you haven’t guessed) To mark the start of Winter we all know that that clocks go back - no doubt by 2am when the clock strikes back to 1am, I’ll be into my 5thth Gin & Tonic by then and cracking out the Jelly Shots but woohoo, I get an extra hour partying the night away, looking like an idiot pretending to be Red Riding Hood! What more could a girl want?
Well, if unlike me, you would like to be slightly more productive with your extra hour, I’ve listed a few ways below!


Stay in bed

Any excuse for a lie in right? I love sleep and you do too, take full advantage of this chance to get an extra hours kip and wake up feeling fresh and ready to go!


Exercise
One thing I definitely will not be doing this Sunday during my hangover…Using the hour to exercise will make you feel more energized and will set the day up nicely, so it’s a great way of spending that hour. What’s more it will justify the 10 biscuits you’re planning on having for lunch, so that’s a bonus!
Tick off your to-do list
If you’ve been putting off your to-do list for weeks and not found the time to tackle it. Well, now is your chance! If it’s an episode on Netflix you haven’t got round to or an article in a magazine you’ve been wanting to read…sit down and get going!

And yes, it’s perfectly fine if you want to spend this hour with your two best friends. First Friend= Netflix, Second Friend= Snacks

Clean the house

Okay, it might not seem like the MOST thrilling way of spending your extra hour, but continuing to ignore the clutter and mess isn’t that fun either…Tidy the house or even just a room and this way, when you’re done you won’t feel like you’ve lost any time! What’s more, you’ll feel great for the rest of the day spending your time in a clean and tidy room.

EAT
Hangovers + Food = LOVE.
Food + Any extra time to eat = LOVE

Sort out your CV
If you’re a regular sufferer of Sunday-Night-Dread, why not change that and use your extra hour to spice up your CV so it’s ready to apply for some other, more exciting jobs come Monday? Who knows, this extra hour could be the reason you land your dream job!
Prepare for Halloween

If you’re not going out this weekend to celebrate and you’re planning a night out on Wednesday (cheeky school night) or next weekend then dedicating this hour to ensure your outfit is on point will ease the stress for on the day!


|| To read original blog post, head to Eylure! ||

|| Dress Pretty Little Thing || 
|| Boots (sold out) Similar TOPSHOP || 
||Earrings Newlook || 

Bye bye Summer...Hello Winter!

Is it just me or is it bloody dark in the mornings now? I struggle as much as anyone to venture out of my cosy bed (even with a 4 month old kitten constantly attacking me trying to play from 5am, I ain’t movin’!) as much as anyone but jesus, I can’t lie, I am very excited for the clocks to go back even to get just that little bit more light for a month, until the impending darkness that is December and January comes to stay!

This weekend marks the official start of Winter. Does this mean it’s now socially acceptable to stay in at the weekend in a onesie, with a glass of red wine in hand? I think so! 
|| To read original blog post, head to Eylure! ||

As much as I love the Summer, I am very ready for cosy evenings, wrapped up warm, watching films, getting fat, eating multiple mince pies, Quality Street, Heroes, Ferrero Rocher’s…the list goes on…As the Summer officially ends I’m seeing it off in style with a house party at my friends house. It’s fancy dress of course and for my sins, I’m actually dressing up. Well, I say dressing up, does a black dress and red cape count? (I’m Little Red Riding Hood if you haven’t guessed) To mark the start of Winter we all know that that clocks go back - no doubt by 2am when the clock strikes back to 1am, I’ll be into my 5thth Gin & Tonic by then and cracking out the Jelly Shots but woohoo, I get an extra hour partying the night away, looking like an idiot pretending to be Red Riding Hood! What more could a girl want?
Well, if unlike me, you would like to be slightly more productive with your extra hour, I’ve listed a few ways below!


Stay in bed

Any excuse for a lie in right? I love sleep and you do too, take full advantage of this chance to get an extra hours kip and wake up feeling fresh and ready to go!


Exercise
One thing I definitely will not be doing this Sunday during my hangover…Using the hour to exercise will make you feel more energized and will set the day up nicely, so it’s a great way of spending that hour. What’s more it will justify the 10 biscuits you’re planning on having for lunch, so that’s a bonus!
Tick off your to-do list
If you’ve been putting off your to-do list for weeks and not found the time to tackle it. Well, now is your chance! If it’s an episode on Netflix you haven’t got round to or an article in a magazine you’ve been wanting to read…sit down and get going!

And yes, it’s perfectly fine if you want to spend this hour with your two best friends. First Friend= Netflix, Second Friend= Snacks

Clean the house

Okay, it might not seem like the MOST thrilling way of spending your extra hour, but continuing to ignore the clutter and mess isn’t that fun either…Tidy the house or even just a room and this way, when you’re done you won’t feel like you’ve lost any time! What’s more, you’ll feel great for the rest of the day spending your time in a clean and tidy room.

EAT
Hangovers + Food = LOVE.
Food + Any extra time to eat = LOVE

Sort out your CV
If you’re a regular sufferer of Sunday-Night-Dread, why not change that and use your extra hour to spice up your CV so it’s ready to apply for some other, more exciting jobs come Monday? Who knows, this extra hour could be the reason you land your dream job!
Prepare for Halloween

If you’re not going out this weekend to celebrate and you’re planning a night out on Wednesday (cheeky school night) or next weekend then dedicating this hour to ensure your outfit is on point will ease the stress for on the day!


|| To read original blog post, head to Eylure! ||

|| Dress Pretty Little Thing || 
|| Boots (sold out) Similar TOPSHOP || 
||Earrings Newlook || 



Okay so yes it happened again. I let myself get into the best place I’ve been for a while, one thing can happen to turn that on its head and things just start to snowball. 
One thing to knock my confidence, to set things off balance and suddenly everything seems just a little bit worse. I start to worry about what everybody thinks and I just lose my way with words. Not only with writing but in day to day life, I retreat into myself and I struggle to make normal conversations. To even think about what I want to say, so instead I stumble on my words and my mind goes blank. Worst. Feeling. Ever. 


Luckily, after suffering from anxiety for almost three years now, (bloody hell) I know trigger signs and how to prevent the inevitable getting any worse. 

This is why it’s hard to keep consistent with this. I took these pictures over a month ago (hence the fab tan and sunny setting), before things didn’t go exactly to plan and just like that it all gets put on hold until I can sort my head out and myself out, until I get the confidence again to post anything. 

Although anxiety has somewhat become “trendy” now with everyone and anyone seeming to be a sufferer, it’s incredible how many people have begun discussing it. It’s now normal to not always feel okay and I’m pleased that 2018 seems to be the year of people opening up about their struggles and battles with mental health. Especially with Mental Health Awareness day occurring last week, it was so apparent how many people, even if they don’t suffer, raising awareness for those who do, to open up, reach out to friends and don’t hide away. 

I can massively fall victim to this. I’ll put on a brave face, pretend I’m okay, go out and get pissed with my friends, then suffer with my own mind all by myself. I’ve only just started to open up to my friends about how I feel, because to be honest, that is what friends are for and if you can’t tell them and rely on your friends then what’s the point in having them? I no longer have to feel the impending doom that my mind likes to make me experience everyday. I feel better and (as cliche as it is) I feel like focusing on the positives is what it’s all about! 


To do this I’ve started clearing out my back room to start filming videos, made a list of blog posts I want to write and beauty products I want to review, I’ve downloaded a 12 week half marathon programme on Aaptiv to get me focused for the next 3 months on my fitness and use running as a sort of meditation, a time that I literally switch off and encourage all those endorphins that after a run make me feel bloody great! Bonus. 
I also started a new job in the last month which to be honest, is amazing. I’m meeting new people and get to spend my day doing what I love and getting creative with PR! 

I feel this is a bit of a nonchalant blog and a situation that didn't really need to be addressed but to be honest, i'm still struggling to put my thoughts down and hone in on the witty sense of styled writing that I want to succumb to., so wasn't really sure what else to post about but knew I wanted to just write something and this is what has come out! It's okay though.

I’ve spent the month putting things into perspective really, because although we may sometimes tell ourselves otherwise...life is pretty fucking good, I just need to keep appreciating that! 



In other news though, how cute is this Jumpsuit? I got a size larger than I would normally due to the fact I always find jumpsuits too small on my bottom half and the top being fine...this is the life of a girl with a big booty and no boobs. Anyway, it's super comfy and had a denim sort of material so knew it would be something that would last! What's more,  I've left it so long to post anything about it it's now on sale for almost half price (: find it on ASOS via the link below!

|| Jumpsuit is ASOS ||


Check Mate...




Okay so yes it happened again. I let myself get into the best place I’ve been for a while, one thing can happen to turn that on its head and things just start to snowball. 
One thing to knock my confidence, to set things off balance and suddenly everything seems just a little bit worse. I start to worry about what everybody thinks and I just lose my way with words. Not only with writing but in day to day life, I retreat into myself and I struggle to make normal conversations. To even think about what I want to say, so instead I stumble on my words and my mind goes blank. Worst. Feeling. Ever. 


Luckily, after suffering from anxiety for almost three years now, (bloody hell) I know trigger signs and how to prevent the inevitable getting any worse. 

This is why it’s hard to keep consistent with this. I took these pictures over a month ago (hence the fab tan and sunny setting), before things didn’t go exactly to plan and just like that it all gets put on hold until I can sort my head out and myself out, until I get the confidence again to post anything. 

Although anxiety has somewhat become “trendy” now with everyone and anyone seeming to be a sufferer, it’s incredible how many people have begun discussing it. It’s now normal to not always feel okay and I’m pleased that 2018 seems to be the year of people opening up about their struggles and battles with mental health. Especially with Mental Health Awareness day occurring last week, it was so apparent how many people, even if they don’t suffer, raising awareness for those who do, to open up, reach out to friends and don’t hide away. 

I can massively fall victim to this. I’ll put on a brave face, pretend I’m okay, go out and get pissed with my friends, then suffer with my own mind all by myself. I’ve only just started to open up to my friends about how I feel, because to be honest, that is what friends are for and if you can’t tell them and rely on your friends then what’s the point in having them? I no longer have to feel the impending doom that my mind likes to make me experience everyday. I feel better and (as cliche as it is) I feel like focusing on the positives is what it’s all about! 


To do this I’ve started clearing out my back room to start filming videos, made a list of blog posts I want to write and beauty products I want to review, I’ve downloaded a 12 week half marathon programme on Aaptiv to get me focused for the next 3 months on my fitness and use running as a sort of meditation, a time that I literally switch off and encourage all those endorphins that after a run make me feel bloody great! Bonus. 
I also started a new job in the last month which to be honest, is amazing. I’m meeting new people and get to spend my day doing what I love and getting creative with PR! 

I feel this is a bit of a nonchalant blog and a situation that didn't really need to be addressed but to be honest, i'm still struggling to put my thoughts down and hone in on the witty sense of styled writing that I want to succumb to., so wasn't really sure what else to post about but knew I wanted to just write something and this is what has come out! It's okay though.

I’ve spent the month putting things into perspective really, because although we may sometimes tell ourselves otherwise...life is pretty fucking good, I just need to keep appreciating that! 



In other news though, how cute is this Jumpsuit? I got a size larger than I would normally due to the fact I always find jumpsuits too small on my bottom half and the top being fine...this is the life of a girl with a big booty and no boobs. Anyway, it's super comfy and had a denim sort of material so knew it would be something that would last! What's more,  I've left it so long to post anything about it it's now on sale for almost half price (: find it on ASOS via the link below!

|| Jumpsuit is ASOS ||



** Disclaimer: I wrote this a while ago now, only just had the chance/confidence to post it! ** 

My relationship with alcohol is like one of a f*ck boy. I know it's no good for me but when I feel weak and vulnerable I always run back. 

One thing that has been a huge eyeopener for me this year is genuinely, especially over the last couple of months is how much I dislike drinking. Well not so much drinking, but who I am when I have one too many. Anyone who has seen me on a night out would find this really hard to believe, from the over-the-top confident girl I carry myself as, to anyone else would think this is the life for me. Truth is, I just really don’t like how it makes me act, I’ve made countless mistakes whilst being intoxicated and I hate how it makes me feel in the aftermath of a ‘sesh’. 


Here I am sitting here on a Sunday evening, the hangziety has been creeping in throughout the day because once again I let one drink turn into a bottle and then a couple of beers and shots thrown in for extra measure. I didn’t even plan on having a night out but it ended up with me down the pub and bars for 4 hours, taking myself to McDonald’s at 1am, headed home in a taxi on my own, money spent that I didn’t need to and a horrific hangover this morning that I could have definitely done without. 

 So, it’s brought me on here to air it all out. Why I feel the need to do it when I really don’t enjoy it is beyond me. Over the last couple of weeks, I have made a conscious effort to focus on more productive aspects of my life (like writing on here, running, my job and creating more content for Instagram) and have only had a drink or a glass of wine with dinner or on a Sunday night watching The Handmaid’s Tale with my mum (tragic, I know). But, then there are these days when I get an overwhelming need to just drink and drink, maybe it’s because I find it difficult to say no, or maybe it’s because there’s something in me deep down that just wants to escape and get absolutely out of it. In this case, I felt like it was a Saturday night and there was nothing better to do, most of my friends were with their boyfriends and I’m still so painfully single, but the thing is, it doesn’t get me anywhere at all. Yeah okay it was a good night (the bits I remember) but it’s made today a complete write off when I had things planned, it’s made me feel guilty and has ramped up my anxiety 10000%. 



To be honest, last night was a tame one, I didn’t make as much of a tit of myself as I have done on previous nights out but only because I think I have been more conscious of how I act when inebriated. I’m also actually surprised that I knew when to call it a night, go and get some fast-food and head home. I was honestly just standing there, swaying, could hardly see straight and I was like nah. Not for me. I’m done.

 I watched a series the other week called Live Well for Longer (I am OBSESSED with programmes like these) and this particular episode was on the effects of alcohol. They took 4 groups of women, as women drink far more than men per week apparently, and each group were separated into how much they have to drink each week, ranging from 1-2 glasses to 2-4 bottles of wine or more. They each had to give up alcohol for a month and the results were shocking! Overall it had a massive beneficial impact on their health with some of them cutting down dramatically afterwards because it was such a substantial difference. 

 I always knew that drinking a lot of alcohol had a negative impact on your health and I’m also convinced that it’s the main reason I am finding it hard to lose weight I have put on over the last couple of years. So, it just makes me think, why do I even bother. I am a much happier and positive person when I’m not in a 3-day hangover ridden with anxiety and self-guilt. It’s a vicious cycle that I get myself stuck in all too often. 


Now, I’m not saying that I am giving up alcohol for good, I just think it’s time to be more responsible with it. I hate being the person who doesn’t know when to stop, ALWAYS ends up blacking out and not being able to remember the second half of the night and then have my friends kindly remind of how much of a twat I was. The only time I’m able to write and concentrate properly or create content for Instagram is at the weekend’s and that’s near on impossible if I’m hungover. I like being busy, being productive and I get such satisfaction from doing something with my day, which just doesn’t happen if I have had a heavy night drinking. So, I just end up sitting there, wondering what on earth happened the night before, feeling guilty and unproductive, oh and an empty bank account just to top it off. 



 Yeah, so it’s pretty clear up until now I’ve had a pretty toxic relationship with alcohol. I’m not sure if it’s just me growing up but I much prefer a girl’s night in, dinner with friends or an actual activity that can involve one or two beers but that’s it. I like to remember what actually occurred throughout the evening and wake up on a Sunday not wanting to jump out a window (figuratively not literally). I want to take each day to do something that's going to have a positive effect on me in the short and long term. It’s going to be hard and I probably will have slip ups but hopefully those slip ups will be less and less often. 

This will be a HUGE test and challenge for me. The next few months is going to give me the opportunity to get stuck in situations where drinking uncontrollably is possible but I’m determined to take it easy, enjoy the good times (lol) and time with my friends instead of not remembering it or spending the whole next day in a coma. 

 We’ll see how it goes!
 I'll be sure to keep you all updated! 

 Best wishes, Hannah xx

My relationship with alcohol...


** Disclaimer: I wrote this a while ago now, only just had the chance/confidence to post it! ** 

My relationship with alcohol is like one of a f*ck boy. I know it's no good for me but when I feel weak and vulnerable I always run back. 

One thing that has been a huge eyeopener for me this year is genuinely, especially over the last couple of months is how much I dislike drinking. Well not so much drinking, but who I am when I have one too many. Anyone who has seen me on a night out would find this really hard to believe, from the over-the-top confident girl I carry myself as, to anyone else would think this is the life for me. Truth is, I just really don’t like how it makes me act, I’ve made countless mistakes whilst being intoxicated and I hate how it makes me feel in the aftermath of a ‘sesh’. 


Here I am sitting here on a Sunday evening, the hangziety has been creeping in throughout the day because once again I let one drink turn into a bottle and then a couple of beers and shots thrown in for extra measure. I didn’t even plan on having a night out but it ended up with me down the pub and bars for 4 hours, taking myself to McDonald’s at 1am, headed home in a taxi on my own, money spent that I didn’t need to and a horrific hangover this morning that I could have definitely done without. 

 So, it’s brought me on here to air it all out. Why I feel the need to do it when I really don’t enjoy it is beyond me. Over the last couple of weeks, I have made a conscious effort to focus on more productive aspects of my life (like writing on here, running, my job and creating more content for Instagram) and have only had a drink or a glass of wine with dinner or on a Sunday night watching The Handmaid’s Tale with my mum (tragic, I know). But, then there are these days when I get an overwhelming need to just drink and drink, maybe it’s because I find it difficult to say no, or maybe it’s because there’s something in me deep down that just wants to escape and get absolutely out of it. In this case, I felt like it was a Saturday night and there was nothing better to do, most of my friends were with their boyfriends and I’m still so painfully single, but the thing is, it doesn’t get me anywhere at all. Yeah okay it was a good night (the bits I remember) but it’s made today a complete write off when I had things planned, it’s made me feel guilty and has ramped up my anxiety 10000%. 



To be honest, last night was a tame one, I didn’t make as much of a tit of myself as I have done on previous nights out but only because I think I have been more conscious of how I act when inebriated. I’m also actually surprised that I knew when to call it a night, go and get some fast-food and head home. I was honestly just standing there, swaying, could hardly see straight and I was like nah. Not for me. I’m done.

 I watched a series the other week called Live Well for Longer (I am OBSESSED with programmes like these) and this particular episode was on the effects of alcohol. They took 4 groups of women, as women drink far more than men per week apparently, and each group were separated into how much they have to drink each week, ranging from 1-2 glasses to 2-4 bottles of wine or more. They each had to give up alcohol for a month and the results were shocking! Overall it had a massive beneficial impact on their health with some of them cutting down dramatically afterwards because it was such a substantial difference. 

 I always knew that drinking a lot of alcohol had a negative impact on your health and I’m also convinced that it’s the main reason I am finding it hard to lose weight I have put on over the last couple of years. So, it just makes me think, why do I even bother. I am a much happier and positive person when I’m not in a 3-day hangover ridden with anxiety and self-guilt. It’s a vicious cycle that I get myself stuck in all too often. 


Now, I’m not saying that I am giving up alcohol for good, I just think it’s time to be more responsible with it. I hate being the person who doesn’t know when to stop, ALWAYS ends up blacking out and not being able to remember the second half of the night and then have my friends kindly remind of how much of a twat I was. The only time I’m able to write and concentrate properly or create content for Instagram is at the weekend’s and that’s near on impossible if I’m hungover. I like being busy, being productive and I get such satisfaction from doing something with my day, which just doesn’t happen if I have had a heavy night drinking. So, I just end up sitting there, wondering what on earth happened the night before, feeling guilty and unproductive, oh and an empty bank account just to top it off. 



 Yeah, so it’s pretty clear up until now I’ve had a pretty toxic relationship with alcohol. I’m not sure if it’s just me growing up but I much prefer a girl’s night in, dinner with friends or an actual activity that can involve one or two beers but that’s it. I like to remember what actually occurred throughout the evening and wake up on a Sunday not wanting to jump out a window (figuratively not literally). I want to take each day to do something that's going to have a positive effect on me in the short and long term. It’s going to be hard and I probably will have slip ups but hopefully those slip ups will be less and less often. 

This will be a HUGE test and challenge for me. The next few months is going to give me the opportunity to get stuck in situations where drinking uncontrollably is possible but I’m determined to take it easy, enjoy the good times (lol) and time with my friends instead of not remembering it or spending the whole next day in a coma. 

 We’ll see how it goes!
 I'll be sure to keep you all updated! 

 Best wishes, Hannah xx


Doing it for the ‘gram” what a funny little term that is.

 Now, don’t get me wrong I have fallen victim to a doing it for the ‘gram post perhaps a few times too many, but what does it actually mean?
Essentially, it’s posting an unrealistic, perhaps over joyous interpretation of what you are actually doing, in order to show off to your peers, get likes on a post or to just to gain attention.  This has become an overused term amongst our generation but it got me thinking this is actually really damaging.

It goes without saying that our culture now is a world in which we are glued to our phones. Social interaction with strangers has become unheard of and weird and we use our phone in order to prevent making eye contact with anyone. We have become obsessed with who is having the best time on holiday, night out or festival, to who is wearing the nicest clothes or has the best makeup. So much so, it’s come to attention recently that even holiday providers and those which host 18-30’s holidays have noticed a huge dip in demand. No one wants to go away on a messy week away to Shagaluf when you can go to Marbella and post all your bikini clad Ocean Beach pictures up on Instagram for all your friends to see.



This brings me to the point of this post, what exactly has happened to just living in the moment. Without a phone, camera, social app in sight and just making an actual memory for yourself instead of however many followers you have; who, may I add, might not even see it (bloody Instagram algorithms!)

I’ve noticed over the last few years that on top of working full-time in PR, commuting 4 hours a day, keeping fit and going to the gym, trying to sustain a love life as well as seeing my friends, I rarely, if ever, took time for myself to just live in the moment. I was constantly running from thing to another, without taking any time to slow down a little.

We live in SUCH a fast-paced world and especially with all of the competition on social media, it’s no wonder why we’re the biggest known generation to suffer so badly from anxiety. Taking a moment to just think about what you are grateful for is considerably underrated. Just taking a few moments each day to take a few breathes, put things into perspective and think about what you’re thankful for can be extremely beneficial in terms of your long-term mental health.


From suffering with anxiety pretty severely a couple of years ago, I make it an essential part of my day or week to take time out and look at objectively. Even just switching off for 15 minutes, coming off the phone to read, play with my dog or cat, make a nice meal or go for a run. Doing something that has a positive effect on my outlook has had a snowball effect into how I feel overall about myself. Before I did this, I used to worry about the next day, what might happen next week or next year even. By doing this it’s made me more aware of how to live in the moment and the Power of Now. I sit there and think is there actually anything horrific happening to me in this exact second? No? Well, then why am I worrying about it? It’s pointless to worry about something that hasn’t even happened yet! And this is something I have been drumming into my brain (sometimes an uphill battle) over the past couple of years.

So here are a few tips to stop just doing it for the gram and actually live in the real world, right here and now:

1.       Put the phone down (at least for half an hour)
2.       Read a chapter of a book
3.       Do some yoga or any of your preferred exercise
4.       Write down 3 things you are grateful for
5.       Talk to your family or call a friend
6.       Get a recipe book out and cook a nice meal
7.       Switch your phone off and watch a film
8.       Just do nothing for around 5 minutes…. genuinely just sit there with your own thoughts and breathe and notice the world around you


DOING IT FOR THE GRAM...


Doing it for the ‘gram” what a funny little term that is.

 Now, don’t get me wrong I have fallen victim to a doing it for the ‘gram post perhaps a few times too many, but what does it actually mean?
Essentially, it’s posting an unrealistic, perhaps over joyous interpretation of what you are actually doing, in order to show off to your peers, get likes on a post or to just to gain attention.  This has become an overused term amongst our generation but it got me thinking this is actually really damaging.

It goes without saying that our culture now is a world in which we are glued to our phones. Social interaction with strangers has become unheard of and weird and we use our phone in order to prevent making eye contact with anyone. We have become obsessed with who is having the best time on holiday, night out or festival, to who is wearing the nicest clothes or has the best makeup. So much so, it’s come to attention recently that even holiday providers and those which host 18-30’s holidays have noticed a huge dip in demand. No one wants to go away on a messy week away to Shagaluf when you can go to Marbella and post all your bikini clad Ocean Beach pictures up on Instagram for all your friends to see.



This brings me to the point of this post, what exactly has happened to just living in the moment. Without a phone, camera, social app in sight and just making an actual memory for yourself instead of however many followers you have; who, may I add, might not even see it (bloody Instagram algorithms!)

I’ve noticed over the last few years that on top of working full-time in PR, commuting 4 hours a day, keeping fit and going to the gym, trying to sustain a love life as well as seeing my friends, I rarely, if ever, took time for myself to just live in the moment. I was constantly running from thing to another, without taking any time to slow down a little.

We live in SUCH a fast-paced world and especially with all of the competition on social media, it’s no wonder why we’re the biggest known generation to suffer so badly from anxiety. Taking a moment to just think about what you are grateful for is considerably underrated. Just taking a few moments each day to take a few breathes, put things into perspective and think about what you’re thankful for can be extremely beneficial in terms of your long-term mental health.


From suffering with anxiety pretty severely a couple of years ago, I make it an essential part of my day or week to take time out and look at objectively. Even just switching off for 15 minutes, coming off the phone to read, play with my dog or cat, make a nice meal or go for a run. Doing something that has a positive effect on my outlook has had a snowball effect into how I feel overall about myself. Before I did this, I used to worry about the next day, what might happen next week or next year even. By doing this it’s made me more aware of how to live in the moment and the Power of Now. I sit there and think is there actually anything horrific happening to me in this exact second? No? Well, then why am I worrying about it? It’s pointless to worry about something that hasn’t even happened yet! And this is something I have been drumming into my brain (sometimes an uphill battle) over the past couple of years.

So here are a few tips to stop just doing it for the gram and actually live in the real world, right here and now:

1.       Put the phone down (at least for half an hour)
2.       Read a chapter of a book
3.       Do some yoga or any of your preferred exercise
4.       Write down 3 things you are grateful for
5.       Talk to your family or call a friend
6.       Get a recipe book out and cook a nice meal
7.       Switch your phone off and watch a film
8.       Just do nothing for around 5 minutes…. genuinely just sit there with your own thoughts and breathe and notice the world around you


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